Crush. 17 Y.O

He watched me place the covers on the floor,

I lied across the floor beside him and
 listened to each others voices

as it evaporated into the dark silence..

I took his phone and randomly played one song that caught my eyes,
I heard his smile, as he whispered, 'I like this song'- echoing into the dawn.

His arm fell off the edge of his bed

placing his hand on my knee-

the warmth was like meeting early summer.

He softly began tapping his fingers,
asking me ' Can you play any instruments?'

'Not at all', I whispered,
His fingers played the keys to the song, as my knee were there to reach,.
I silently frowned, so that he wouldn't be able to hear.

'I can play the piano,' his voice filled my frown.

As the song continued to play,
as his fingers continued to strum,
as my heart continued to beat,
as my knee continued to place,

I prayed to dawn,-
To please make this moment last. Hoping for the sun to be a little delay today.

                                                                    ,,,,... I think I'm feeling somthing different.

to a mother from a daughter.

Ten things I'm not sorry for.

10. For showing diversity.
9. For making bad grades.
8. For being who I've become.
7. for talking back to teachers and getting phone calls home.
i only did it because i had things to say.
And i was right. i had to prove her that before the conversation was through
6. for not being intelligent enough for this century.
5. for being shy at times.
4. for being afraid to speak out .
3. for yelling to state my facts.
2. for defending myself when i have an opinion.
1. for showing personal independence

Ten things I'm sorry for.

10. effortless and timeless.
9. for what you had to go through.
8. for not listening when i should .
7. for learning when I'm sleeping.
6. for not being thankful when i should.
5. for proving you wrong when you were right.
4. for not being the best daughter in the world.
3. for not being as loving as the other daughters.
2. for not helping you when you needed me the most.
1. for denying everything you've ever said to me.

Ten things i hate from what you did.

10. leave me
9. less memories .
8. then comes back acting like you know me.
7. for not ever listening.
6. for not ever having a right conversation.
5. telling me that i was useless.
4. never being on my side.
3. avoiding me when others are over.
2. lack of thinking of what i want.
1. for destroying my dreams
-1. realizing how much I've given up for you.

Ten things i love from you.

10. never gave up on me.
9. telling me you love me everyday even though i never say it back.
8. having full trust in me.
7. for trying your best as a mother.
6. never thinking about giving up.
5. The freedom you give me comparing to any other mothers in this country.
4. me always as your number one.
3. never told me to give up. nor said not to.
2. giving me chances.
1. being my most hated be-loving mother.

Ten things you never knew. [currently]

10. That i cried for you ever night.
9. afraid that things were ever going to go back on track.
8. blowing kisses before i went to sleep after my night prayer, sending kisses to every direction of the room because i didn't know where you were at.
7. if you were ok.
6. if i was sure that i loved you.
5. being proud of where I'm from.
4. being proud of what I've witnessed.
3. Praying every night, 365 days.
2. i didn't want to see you again.
1. and realized that i had to.

five things i wish from you

5. believe
4. hope.
3. more chances.
2. less fighting.
1. more communication.

Five things i never wanted.

5. this life.
4. this place.
3. us here.
2. coming back to Korea.
1. falling apart.

Five things we need.

5. communication.
4. trust in each other.
3. less lies.
2. stronger relationship
1. staying together.

I realized,
-never knew having a mother was such a great gift.

Last words,
your a true hero.