Mother I confess, secretly

"I'm constantly going to that phrase where I'm just wanting to fly with the dolphins
and swim with the eagles.. "

I am a horrible daughter. I just felt the need of admitting that. Mom, I'm sorry.I'm sorry that I'm never there for you when you need me. I'm sorry for keeping you worried constantly in your life. I'm so sorry for not being welcoming when you come back from work for over ten hours. I'm sorry for ever hurting your feelings. I'm sorry for never showing you my best. & For denying your love you try to show me.

I want to go on an adventure.I want to go cry in a big field while the sunsets and I want to stay up the whole night counting the stars..

& Then, one day I would like to go back time, to the time where I was little and had my mom as a best friend where we had no secrets to hide and the times where I just kissed you constantly because I loved her so much. It's been over five years since she's every heard me say that to her. I miss giving her hugs and kisses unawkwardly.